Wednesday Things

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Hey, everyone! I feel like it’s been a while since I posted, but that’s just because I’ve been really busy (in a fun way!) (except school) (gross).

  1. I know we’re already more than 1/12 of the way in, but 2014 is going to be so seriously exciting and challenging and new and fun. My fiancee and I both have some really cool new opportunities and ideas that may help to bring in some more money and enjoying ourselves at the same time (who would have thought?). And then there’s that whole getting married thing, of course. That’s exciting, too (obviously)!
  2. Some of you may know that my dad lost his job a couple weeks ago. But, before he even finished editing his resume, he got a call from some one he used to work with who needs help with programs my dad designed years ago! Now, my dad gets to work for himself as an independent contractor AND work from home (his dream!). This is awesome. Especially with the added stress of planning a wedding, it gives us just that little bit of breathing room that does wonders for our sanity.
  3. I really miss my Grammy. She’d be so excited to hear about everything new going on and planning the wedding and everything. It’s still hard. But I’m really excited to have a reason to bring my family all together again for a happy celebration, since the last time we were all together was a funeral. It’ll be so great to dance and visit with my family and make those memories.
  4. Count-downs: 73 days until I walk for graduation! Oh my goodness. I just have to survive 73 more days. Basically 10 more weeks. I can do that. Counting down has never really done much for me in the past but when it comes to counting down my undergrad, it seems to make it feel like there’s actually a light at the end of the tunnel. Also, there’s exactly 80 days until I get married. Holy crap. This is the one countdown you probably don’t want to feel like it flies by because there’s so much to get done! Now that my dad has a job again and we have more options, I’m really trying to get back on track and as much done ahead of time as possible so that once finals and such come around, I can focus on finishing those strongly.
  5. Valentine’s Day! I’m celebrating tomorrow, on the 13th, because there’s no getting out of waitressing for Valentine’s Day. I’m really not looking forward to it (like that even needs to be said). It’s one of what we call “amateur holidays,” where people who don’t usually eat at expensive restaurants come out to eat. They often set a budget and then spend just under that, leaving only a small amount for a tip (which often ends up being 10% or less). Also, just about every reservation is a 2-person party, which means smaller check averages. Oh, well. Hopefully this will be my last-ever Valentine’s as a waitress.
  6. Speaking of which, please send some good vibes my way. As I eluded to above, I’m looking into new ways to bring in some good money and I’m really hoping I can quit the restaurant really soon. I die a little inside every time I have to deal with anything related to it.
  7. I was really struggling with some of those evil, self-critical demons this morning. Do you ever have times or days when you just hear those awfully negative voices in your head so much more strongly than usual? That was today. Fortunately, grabbing some coffee, having a sit-down lunch at the table with my Daddy and going on a walk with my parents later all helped me feel better. For now, at least. I always seem to struggle in January and February (Hello, Seasonal Affective Disorder), but being aware of this pattern for myself and having some lovely people supporting and surrounding me is more helpful than ever.
  8. The honeymoon is officially booked! We’re going to an all-inclusive resort in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic. Right before the travel agent put the first payment down, I had a moment of panic about how we could probably settle for some hotel somewhere close by for a week. But, I know that one tip for wedding budgeting that I keep reading is to cut money from the things that aren’t so important to you personally (flowers, alcohol, etc) and put the core cash towards the things that are. In this case, I know this trip will be amazing and once-in-a-lifetime. I know that paying for experiences rather than material things can be scary but oh so great. And now that it’s booked and set in stone, I have to be happy about it! It’s a win-win.
  9. Oh, I got my official wedding website set up! CLICK HERE to go see it!
  10. I have GOT to get myself a massage soon. My right shoulder + that side of my neck have been in constant pain for the last couple weeks and my right shoulder actually looks swollen because of how big the knot is in it. Friday’s payday – maybe I’ll finally get around to making an appointment then!

I hope everyone has a wonderful Valentine’s, whether you celebrate or don’t, are single or not, go out somewhere fancy or stay home and eat Chinese. =]

Valentine’s Day…

…is still TWO WEEKS AWAY. And I’m already seeing all these anti-Valentine’s Day posts and graphs and links. And, I’m sorry, but I really think it’s obnoxious.

Now, because I do happen to be in a relationship, I know a lot of readers will not consider my opinion valid on this topic. But I have been through Valentine’s Days single before, too.

It annoys me when people freak out about anti-Valentine’s things. No amount of “boycotting” is going to make the holiday go away. Sure, it’s Hallmark’s favorite money-making holiday, but that doesn’t make it evil. Don’t get anything from Hallmark, then.

I guess my point is that, if you don’t plan on celebrating V-Day this year, why ruin it for everyone else? Why give a normal day with a label for the sake of tradition have the power over you to ruin your day? Or even week? (Or, in the case of the links and blog posts I’ve been seeing, every day of February until Valentine’s.)  There’s no real harm in Valentine’s Day.  Why act like it’s the worst thing to happen to you?

You know that quote, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent?” This holiday is the exact same way. This day is not “ruining your life.”  You are the one making yourself feel depressed or angry.

And, in my opinion, the worst part is that most of these very protesters of Valentine’s will abandon their claimed stance on the topic one they are in relationships. It’d at least be much better to hold your opinions of V-Day regardless of your romantic status.

The Best Conversation I’ve Had With A Public Schooler.

Ben: “That is the best thing about life: One day ends, another begins.”

Me: “And, perhaps, that is also the worst.”

“How do you see that?”

“That a good or great day has to end at all. If you’re a pessimist, then you know that, eventually, any good day leads to an awful one.”

“Any good day leads to a bad one because you see it as worse than the day before. But in the view of your life, it is nothing but a short time.”

“Then, maybe, we should realize hat each day is a completely other thing from another and, therefore, shouldn’t be compared.”

“Then in that respect, there is no such thing as a good or bad day because there is nothing to compare to.”

“Except that you derive more pleasure or happiness from the experience that one day brings than from that of another.”

“But does that make it bad? Does it mean it’s bad when you feel unhappy? Because you might regret a choice you made, making it ‘bad,’ when in reality, it was the best choice for you.”

“Ah. In the present, you may only know for sure that you are unhappy with a day until you get a chance to review it in hindsight, however far in the future that may be. You may realize that you really grew from an experience or choice, or learn to recognize similar situations. But that is no guarantee that you will ever be happy with any day.”

“Which only furthers my point.”

“Of course it does. We were both moving to towards the same point, we only presented different questions on the way there.”

The best days I’ve had in a long while.

I have had the best last few days.

Thursday night was my choir concert. We were called to show up way earlier than we needed to be there (four-o-clock call and the concert was at seven-thirty), but I was able to get to know the people in my show choir a lot better. Justin said I look like Doris Day, so that’s what he calls me now. =]

The all-girl show choir went before the senior show choir, the one that I’m in.   My group was hanging backstage manically dancing to the other group’s music.  Oh, it was so much fun! Even though I’m in show choir, I’m not one to just… dance.  But back stage, everyone just let loose and I think I might have actually been doing it right.

I will admit, I made more mistakes this concert than usual, but it was still fun.

I had some great people come see me, so that was pretty much amazing. A lot of alumni choir friends came to the concert, too, and that was really great to see them.

Friday night, I had dinner with my family and my sister’s boyfriend. That was pretty cool because I was able to geektalk with my nerdy dad and sister. 

After that was my show choir’s Christmas party.  My hair was great and I had a great outfit.   ;]  Near the end of things, we went caroling.   When we approached a house and rang the doorbell, everyone had a great idea to Continue reading

E.E. Cummings

skies may be blue;yes
(when gone are hail and sleet and snow)
but bluer than my darling’s eyes,
spring skies are no

hearts may be true;yes
(by night or day in joy or woe)
but truer than your lover’s is,
hearts do not grow

nows may be new;yes
(as new as april’s first hello)
but new as this our thousandth kiss,
no now is so

 

 

 

(for those of you new to Cumming’s writing, there are no typos. only the way he intended it to look and flow.)